Great sex begins in the mind. The sexual actions to follow are simply the icing that make the whole sexy-cake one sumptuous combination. If you can focus your lover’s attention on sensual topics and sexy circumstances, then your hands, lips and other parts can bring these imaginings to life.
1. Exercise and Hug People
No one expects you to be a Victoria’s Secret model or Aquaman. Your lover should appreciate you as you are. Exercising to have better sex isn’t about changing your appearance – it’s about feeling really good – but mostly exercise is about helping you feel sexy.
Sex is a physical activity. There are numerous biological functions involved in human arousal. The blood pressure rises, the pulse and heartbeat increase. Blood vessels all over the body expand lubricating the genitals. Similar bodily responses occur during cardiovascular and strength training exercises.
Oxytocin is the feel-good chemical produced when we’re affectionate. Also, it gets released when we move our bodies. The level of this love chemical your body produces is dependent upon how often you make love, exercise and engage in non-sexual affection.
2. Schedule Sex
It seems counterintuitive to take the spontaneity out of copulation, but many researchers agree that making sexual health a priority for couples helps produce more orgasms, health benefits and intimacy between lovers.
Scheduling sex is tricky because you’ve got to consider both of your libidos. One person might have a higher sex drive than you do. The key to getting a schedule to work is to communicate with your partner honestly about your needs and ask for the same in return.
Look at the appointment not as a time you must have intercourse but more as a period of time (try an hour) when you give your total focus to your partner (and vice versa), whether it’s in the buff or not. It’s more about creating intimacy and affection than getting off.
3. Try Tantric Sex
Tantric sex is an ancient Hindu practice used as a spiritual tool and reportedly can produce life-changing orgasms. Tantra translates to mean the expansion and weaving of energy. The practice comes from a similar school of thought as yoga.
Tantra takes the goal of having an orgasm and putting it on the bedside table. It involves prolonging the male’s erection, mindfulness of breath and worshipping your partner. The ancient work The Complete Illustrated Kama Sutra by Vatsyayana is an ancient text and accompaniment to the practice of Tantric sex.
Worshipping your partner is easy. You take turns rubbing, tickling and massaging them in any form they like, and they reciprocate, which builds arousal and produces loads of oxytocin.
4. Both Partners Should Initiate Sexy Activities
It seems easy, but humans often must squish those aroused feelings due to responsibilities like kids or jobs. Many people get in the habit of ignoring those buzzy tingles, and eventually, the tingles happen less and less often.
Following those impulses versus ignoring them gives the body more reason to produce feelings of lust. Asking both partners to follow their body’s sensual cues creates confidence, spontaneity, and intimacy.
We’ve discussed how satisfying sex begins in the mind. Knowing your partner wants you by pursuing you keeps the opportunity for lovemaking a conscious awareness and all these sexy thoughts lead to lust.
5. Enjoy Pornography Together
The internet and pornography are like a Hobnob and a cup of tea: they go together. There are videos, cartoons, graphic novels, short stories and erotic poetry to choose from. Various books have dragged erotica into the mainstream.
Watching pornography with your lover is an enlightening endeavor, offering opportunities to watch their responses to different types of sexual acts. Of course, choosing what type of pornography to share is an important conversation to conduct before firing up the laptop.
Reading erotica with your partner is fun. Use it to set the mood and see how the story develops. Pull out Henry Miller’s Tropic of Cancer or wield DH Lawrence’s Lady Chatterley’s Lover to impress your lover with your literary prowess.