Sex 101: How to Turn a Sexual Fantasy into Reality

Introducing something new into the bedroom is a nerve-wracking experience. But sexual experimentation is a great way to keep the intimacy in a relationship alive! With many couples admitting that their sex lives are not perfect, wouldn’t it be fun to go back to those early days when you couldn’t keep your hands off each other?

Sex itself isn’t just a physical act, it is very much a mental process too. As you pleasure each other physically, letting your imagination roam freely can also enhance the physical sensations so that sex is better than ever.

what is a sexual fantasy?

What is a sexual fantasy?

As sexual fantasy is a memory or a mental image that enhances your sexual arousal. Sexual fantasies are universal in that almost everyone has them in some form and they occur in all societies across the globe. However, because of the nature of some fantasies, they aren’t always acted upon. Some people have fantasies about their sexy next-door neighbour but have no intention of cheating on their partner with them.

The difference between a sexual fantasy and desire?

Understanding the difference between a sexual fantasy and desire is very important. A sexual fantasy is a place where you are free to explore wild scenarios and extraordinary circumstances. In fantasy, everyday limits to not apply. You have boundless energy; unlimited money and your safety is guaranteed. During a fantasy, you can explore your own version of reality without having to justify or explain yourself to anyone.

Fantasies are unfulfilled and exist in our imagination alone. A desire is something that you want more of in real life. So, a fantasy becomes desire when you make it real. One of the first steps in making fantasy a reality is to share your fantasy with a partner and express your desire for that fantasy to form part of your erotic life.

what is a sexual fantasy

What are the most common sexual fantasies?

Oral Sex

Receiving great oral sex was one of the top fantasies from one recent study. Perhaps it has something to do with the power dynamic of pleasuring someone who is totally submissive to you.

Sex in Public

Although it is against the law, having sex in public is something that people have been doing for years. Think of all those times you’ve crept away to the public toilets for a quickie with your partner, or when you just couldn’t wait till you got home. Most people cite the thrill of getting caught as the basis for this type of fantasy.


Despite being happy with the partner that they already have. Many people fantasise about sex with someone else, but with no intention of carrying it out in real life. It could be someone of the same sex, a Hollywood superstar or even one of your partners friends (eek!). This type of fantasy is very popular because it is super naughty!


Watching someone masturbating or having sex is something that many people have fantasies about. These fantasies offer lots of opportunity for couples role play.


Dominating your partner or being dominated yourself is a huge turn on for some people. Domination has become increasingly popular since the release of Fifty Shades of Grey with a recent study finding that a whopping 65% of women fantasised about it. For those hoping to make this fantasy a reality, there are lots of different BDSM scenarios to draw upon for inspiration.


Lots of people fantasise about performing a sexy strip tease for their partner, or having one performed for them. For others, this could be a fantasy about starring in your own porn film or masturbating for your partners pleasure.

Sex with a stranger

Sex with a stranger is a hugely popular fantasy and one that is often played out between couples. This could involve pretending that you and your partner have never met before and flirting in a bar before heading to a hotel room. This is a fantasy which is great fun to act out and has endless roleplay possibilities.


For some, real romance is something that they fantasise about. Whether it’s the scattering of rose petals, glasses of champagne or staring dreamily into each other’s eyes. Romantic fantasies are extremely popular.

Lesbian Sex

Lesbian sex fantasies are often something that straight women talk about having. It could be that lesbian sex involves a lot of the things that women enjoy such as oral sex, fingering and stimulation of the clit. It might be that this type of relationship is taboo for straight women.

Whatever fantasies you have, it is important to note that you aren’t defined by them. After all, fantasy doesn’t have to be reality. However, if you do decide to take a step into unchartered territory with your partner, there are ways that you can safely explore your fantasies with a partner:

what is a sexual fantasy

Eradicate any guilt

Everyone has fantasies, but we hide them because we often feel too ashamed to talk about them. A lot of fantasies will remain fantasies and never be acted upon. It is important to separate this from desire and acknowledge what they are.

Write them down

If you feel too shy to tell your partner about your fantasies, write them down and let your partner read them. Writing everything down may be something that you find extremely cathartic.

Talk to each other

Communication is extremely important when choosing to make a fantasy into a reality. Whether it’s a new relationship or a long-term partnership, you should be secure in the knowledge that revealing your innermost thoughts will not alter the relationship at all.

It’s completely normal for people to have fantasies and it is a lot of fun acting them out in the right circumstances. If you think that revealing a fantasy might cause some problems, it might be better kept for your own personal enjoyment.

Have fun

The most important part about making your fantasy into a reality is making sure that you both feel safe, comfortable and you’re having fun.


Does Size really Matter: What to do if You have a Small Penis

Having a small penis is not a laughing matter for some people. However, it is important to remember that beauty is in the eye of the beholder! For example, did you know that a micro penis is the perfect size for G Spot stimulation during penetrative sex? That’s right, a small penis is perfect for reaching all those hard to access hotspots.

But what exactly is a small dick?

Believe it or not, the average penis size differs according to what part of the world that you originate from. For example, African men have on average the largest size penis in the world with an excess of between 6 and 7 inches when erect. The United Kingdom, Australia, Norway, Mexico and Italy also measure on the larger size, with averages of 5.8-6.3 inches when standing to attention. Asian countries such as Thailand, South Korea and India have an average size of between 3.6-4.3 when erect which although smaller, is no less mighty.

How to get a bigger penis

What to do when you have a small penis?

As men, we are taught that the size of our dick is very important. We brag about our dicks, we boast about the things that we do with them and we are told that the bigger our dicks are, the more of a man we are. This can cause a lot of confidence issues for men, especially of you don’t quite measure up to these unrealistic expectations. If you think about it, our dicks cause us almost as much anxiety as they do pleasure:

Our dicks are meant to look a certain way – many of them don’t.

Our tackle is meant to be a certain size – most of them aren’t.

Our cock is supposed to be thick and girthy- erm, not always.

Our dicks are meant to go hard whenever we want them to – good luck with that!

Our penises are supposed to know the perfect time to ejaculate – really?

According to a recent internet survey, 45% of men are dissatisfied with the size of their manhood and 42% would like their penis to be larger. If you are one of those people who lack confidence in all things cock-related, there are things that you can do to boost your self-esteem. If you’re one of the lucky ones who feel completely at ease with your trouser department, the best advice we can offer you is ‘just because you have a large weapon’ don’t use it to make other people feel small. Mocking men about having a small penis is a standard insult, but it is body shaming to those who can’t help it.

Learn to love your small penis

A lot of men get their sex education from pornography where the expectations on men are unrealistic. These men are usually very large in size, become aroused quickly and ejaculate after prolonged periods of extremely acrobatic sex. So, it’s no wonder we are so paranoid about our peckers! Around 68% of men questioned in a recent survey measured between 4.5- 6 inches when erect, so pornography doesn’t really offer a fair comparison does it?

When it comes to pleasuring a partner, penis size is only important if you think of sex as just penetrative sex. Those who have a smaller penis may find penetration difficult. But on the other hand, those with a larger penis may also find that they struggle to enjoy penetrative sex. Focusing solely on penetrative sex means that you forget about all the other aspects of sexual intercourse that make it fun. It may help to remember that up to 70% of women struggle to orgasm through penetrative sex. Therefore, foreplay plays a very important factor in a healthy and mutually satisfying sex life. Learning to love your small dick also involves remembering that your pleasure is also important. So, take some time to communicate with your partner and let them know what works for you, and what isn’t working so well!

How to get a bigger penis

Some of the best sex positions for a small dick include:

Doggy-style is a great sex position for a small penis because it offers deep penetration and the opportunity to reach around and stimulate the clitoris too.

Reverse cowgirl also facilitates deep penetration for you. But adding a cushion underneath your pelvis will elevate your hips so it feels deeper for your partner.

Side saddle involves sitting on a couch with your legs open whilst your lover lowers themselves onto your penis. Again, this offers a deeper penetration and easy access to your partners erogenous zones.

Missionary anal provides the intimacy of face to face sex and combines it with deep penetration. This position is similar to missionary but with the legs over the shoulder, so the anus is within easy reach. This is also a great position from vaginal penetration.

How to get a bigger penis

How to increase the size of your dick

If you’re one of the 42% of men who would like to permanently increase penis size but without risky operations, dick fillers or creams, we may have a solution for you. The Bathmate Hydromax is an award winning water-based penis pump that naturally increases the size of your penis so that you feel more confident about your manhood. However, the Bathmate Hydromax isn’t just a penis pump for small dicks, this pump is available in several different sizes from less than 3 inches in erect length up to 9 inches.

Whilst we still think that it’s important to love what nature gave you, there is nothing wrong with making the most of what you have. The Bathmate Hydromax uses water to draw blood into the penis so that the penis becomes engorged. As a result, your cock is thicker, longer and your erection is rock hard. We recently conducted a study in which 70% of Bathmate customers experienced an increase in the length and girth of their penis after regular usage.

To ensure that you experience a permanent increase in size, Bathmate recommended that you use the Hydromax between three to five times a week. Whilst results will vary from person to person, you should start seeing permanent results within months.

Happy Pumping!

Friends with Benefits: Creating an agreement

Being friends with benefits can be a liberating experience! After all, who doesn’t enjoy no strings sex with another person that they fancy, trust and can have a good time with. But… that doesn’t always mean that there won’t be some complications.

Putting together a friends with benefits agreement isn’t as clear cut as you first think because every situation is different. But one thing that is abundantly clear, in every situation there is the need for lots of communication. Putting together an agreement that sets clear boundaries and expectations before you take a step towards the bedroom may feel a little boring, but trust me, setting out a friends with benefits agreement is one way to ensure that you are both on the exact same page.

Friends with benefits

So how do we avoid friends with benefits drama?

There are several rules to follow to avoid getting attached to your fuck buddy or experiencing unnecessary drama. Thankfully, Bathmate is here to help make sure that your friends with benefits journey runs smoothly.

Be clear about your intentions

When you are sitting down and discussing the rules of your friends with benefits situation, it is important to be clear about your intentions. That way, both you and your fuck buddy are both sharing the same mindset. Be clear about the things that you want to get out of the situation and make sure that you advocate for yourself. Don’t play games with other people’s emotions either. You might be getting lots of great sex, but if you think your buddy might be getting a little too attached, its time to end things.

Don’t expect that it will end in a relationship

Be true to yourself and think carefully about the reasons why you want to enter into a friends with benefits situation. Is it really just for fun, or are you hoping that the arrangement will lead to something else? Don’t fall into the trap of thinking that your buddy is going to fall in love with you and want a relationship. That rarely happens and will lead to disappointment.

Friends with benefits

Keeping things a secret?

Another way to avoid drama is to discuss whether to keep the arrangement a secret or if you are letting it out in the open. This is particularly important for those who share the same group of friends, particularly if you keep disappearing together at the end of nights out. Some of your friends may have reservations. It is important to bear that in mind when discussing the arrangement with them as they could be that they are worried about one of you. Take their concerns into account but remember the decision is ultimately yours.

Keep checking on each other

Take some time to check in on each other to make sure that you’re both still on the same page. It is easy to develop romantic feelings in this situation because of the intimacy of the arrangement. Communicating regularly, will ensure that you are both still comfortable with how things are. However, these conversations are probably better kept outside of the bedroom where there are no distractions. It might be that you meet regularly for a coffee or lunch so that you can catch up, make sure that you are both still okay with things, and have a proper conversation. Remember, if you find that you want to spend more time with your fuck buddy outside of the bedroom, it might be time to re-evaluate your situation.

Having regular conversations and ‘checking in’ will also help to strengthen the friendship and trust that you have with one another. It will also help to prevent misunderstandings.

Lay down some ground rules

Laying down some ground rules from the beginning and nipping certain behaviours in the bud very early into the arrangement helps to keep things running smoothly. Are you having overnight stays? Is it late night booty calls? What happens if one of you meets someone? Do you buy each other gifts on birthdays or Christmas? Is sexting acceptable and when? Are you still meeting other people? Every friends with benefits arrangement is different, so think about what you are both hoping to get out of the situation and keep that in mind.

Friends with benefits

Stay within your comfort zone

No string sex is fun, but that still doesn’t mean that you must do anything that you don’t feel comfortable with. Respect each other’s boundaries and be upfront about the things that you find acceptable in and out of the bedroom. This isn’t just about sex either, but the way that you behave with each other in public or when you are out with friends.

Use protection!

Depending on the arrangement that you have come up with, one or both of you may be seeing multiple partners. Discussing contraception and using condoms must be your first priority. It is also worth talking about regular STI testing and how often this will take place.

Talk about how the arrangement will end

At risk of sounding all doom and gloom, talking about the ending before the arrangement actually begins will help to prevent lots of fuck buddy drama. If you’re clear that the arrangement will not end in a relationship, establish how long you are expecting the situation to last. Will it carry on until one of you starts dating someone else? What if one of you gets bored? Are you still planning to stay friends afterwards? What if the arrangement stops being fun? Is that when things will end. Putting all of this into perspective before you begin can help to save a lot of heartache in the future.

Good Vibes For Hydropump users!

Traditionally, vibrators were products that were aimed solely at women. After all, the first very first vibrator was a tool that cured women of ‘hysteria’ and stimulated the clitoris. Over the years, men were quite happy to let women enjoy their vibrators and continued to plod along in a happy, ignorant bliss. That was until the sexual revolution of the noughties when the use of vibrators became more openly discussed outside the home. Men began to wonder what all the fuss was about… and boom, a new generation of guybrators were created!


Whilst using a penis pump, adding vibration into the fray might be something that hasn’t really crossed your mind before. But, including some sexual titillation is a great way to make dick pumping more fun, whilst also increasing blood flow to the penis so it stays nice and healthy between work outs. With this in mind, we decided to look at some good vibes for pump users.

Bathmate Hydrovibe

Anyone who uses a Bathmate Hydro Pump knows all the features of these best-selling penis pumps. They help to increase the firmness and girth of a penis, whilst also helping to create long lasting erections. However, now that the science behind pumping had been perfected, the design team behind the world best selling penis pump wanted to explore the element of pleasurable pumping too.

The Bathmate Hydrovibe is a vibrating attachment that connects to your Bathmate pump and uses two powerful vibrating bullets to turn your Hydro Pump into an instant jacuzzi. As the bubbles stroke and massage the penis, the powerful vibrations create toe curling sensations. As your arousal increases, the powerful massage also helps to distribute blood flow around the penis, resulting in a thicker, stronger and healthier penis.

The Bathmate Prostate Vibe

Once full arousal has been achieved, experience the extreme satisfaction of a dual orgasm by combining intense prostate massage with external pleasure. The Bathmate Prostate Vibe’s ergonomic curves are shaped to fit the unique contours of your body, whilst ten speeds of vibration stimulate the prostate and perineum simultaneously. The design of the Bathmate Prostate Vibe enables you to enjoy it wherever you like, and because it’s waterproof, its perfect for the bath or shower. As you rock your way to an explosive finale, firmly stroke your erection for the perfect combination of external and internal stimulation. The results are guaranteed to be explosive!

Bathmate vibe rings

Bathmate Vibe Rings

If you’re pumping to boost an erection before sex, maintaining that erection is very important. Using a cock ring after pumping helps to keep your erection firm, hard and longer lasting. A cock ring can also help to maintain an erection after orgasm, so you can experience multiple orgasms. The Bathmate Vibe Rings are a range of vibrating cock rings that help to add exciting new elements to penetrative sex or masturbation after pumping.

The Bathmate Tickle works by stimulating yourself and a female partner during sex, so it helps to increase her pleasure and shorted the male and female orgasm gap.

The Bathmate Strength uses two bands, so it has a firmer grip, thus creating a more powerful erection.

The Bathmate 8 Vibe is worn around the penis and the testicles, so it is a double whammy of pleasure. Insert a flaccid penis through the top hole and your testicles through the bottom. You benefit from the firmness of the cock ring, but as you climax the testicle ring prevents the natural restriction of the testicles, so orgasms are more intense and longer lasting.

The Bathmate Stretch can be worn on the penis or around the testicles. On the penis the wearer will experience powerful vibration to the base of your cock. On the scrotum, the firm grip prevents the scrotum from retracting to create an intense climax, whilst powerful vibration adds the icing on the cake.

Vibrating Masturbation Stroker

After a pumping workout, it might seem a shame to see such a strong erection go to waste! Therefore, you could always work on your edging skills using a vibrating masturbating stroker. A masturbation stroker usually consists of a textured sleeve in which the penis is inserted. Those who want to increase their stamina in the bedroom can use the stroker to practice techniques in which they bring themselves close to the brink of orgasm, and then work towards delaying or preventing climax until they are ready to orgasm. This is called edging and is a very effective technique for those who struggle with premature ejaculation or who simply want to last longer in bed.

Bathmate anal training plugs

Vibe Anal Training Plugs

After a dick pump workout, there’s no need to put your feet up and have a rest. Bring up the rear with an anal training session and keep up the momentum. The Vibe Anal Training Plugs come in three different sizes for graduated enjoyment whilst a powerful vibrating bullet delivers ten speeds of pure pleasure. Wide loops at the base of the plug prevent travel and the tapered tip enables comfortable insertion. Once you become accustomed to the smaller sizes, graduate to a larger bulb and enjoy increased internal pressure and mind-blowing stimulation.

Bathmate Vibe Bullet

Vibrating bullets are extremely versatile and discreet so they are an ideal partner for those who enjoy a discreet penis pump workout in the bathroom. In between pumps, use the Bathmate Vibe to boost arousal by titillating the erogenous zones such as the nipples, testicles and penis. This can help to increase the blood flow to your penis whilst helping to get in the mood too. The more aroused you feel, the harder your erection will become. As you massage your penis between pumps, adding some lubricant and a vibrating bullet into the mix can create some incredible sensations.

Remember Remember: Creating a spark this Bonfire Night

Bonfire night is one of the nicest times of the year in the UK, even though it usually rains. As we stand together next to the bonfire eating treacle toffee and marvelling at the extravagant firework displays; it signifies the start of cooler days, colder nights and snuggling together in front of an open fire.

If you’re in a relationship, this time of year is perfect for adding a little extra spark into your sex life by treating yourself to a new sex toy from Bathmate Pleasure. For those who are happily single, this is a great time to create fireworks in the bedroom with some of our favourite sex toys for masturbation.

creating a spark in the bedroom this bonfire night

Prostate Vibe

The anus is one of natures best kept secrets for both men and women. This passage to pleasure is full of stimulating nerve endings whilst also provide a direct route to the male P spot, or the prostate as it is also known. The Bathmate Prostate Vibe is a vibrating prostate massager that works by stimulating the P Spot with powerful caresses to provide an intense, full body orgasm.

The tapered tip and deep contours are designed with comfort in mind, whilst the gentle curve of the massager ensures that it hits all those delicious hotspots. Choose from ten speeds of vibration whist you rock yourself to an explosive climax. For best results, combine with the Bathmate Anal Lube and spritz with a generous helping. If you’re escaping the cold and heading off for a break in the sun, you can avoid airport scrutiny by carrying Anal Toy Wipes instead of a liquid sex toy cleaner.

Get Pumped

Traditionally, a penis pump isn’t a sex toy for masturbation but a sexual health aid for those who struggle with erection problems or are seeking to increase the size of their penis. However, the best-selling Hydro Vibe has added a sensational new twist to the Bathmate Hydro Pump. By attaching the Hydro Vibe to any Bathmate Pump (except the HydroXtreme II) this creates a vibrating unit which stimulates the water inside to chamber to send your endorphins sky rocketing! The powerful hydro massage also stimulates blood flow to the penis, so it helps to keep the penis nice and healthy too.

creating a spark in the bedroom this bonfire night

Good Vibes

For both men and women, a vibrating bullet is one of the most versatile and exciting sex toys that you can keep in your collection. Not only are these pocket rockets small and discreet, but they boast incredible power too. The Bathmate Vibe Bullet offers ten super stimulating patterns of pleasure, whilst a curved nub delivers pinpoint pressure, so you hit all those pleasurable hotspots. Because the Vibe Bullet is waterproof, you can enjoy the toe curling sensations in the bath, shower or private pool. The Vibe Bullet can be slipped easily into a washbag and purrs discreetly during use so it’s the perfect choice for those who prefer to keep their bedroom activities under wraps.

A cock ring may not seem like an obvious unisex sex toy, but cock rings are far more versatile than you have been led to believe. Traditionally, cock rings like the Bathmate Power Ring have been used after penis pumping to help maintain an erection, or to help prolong an erection during sex. However, wearing a cock ring such as a Bathmate Rhythm Ring adds a new dimension to masturbation because every stroke magnifies the powerful vibration. Better still, erections last up to four times longer with a cock ring, so many men reported experiencing multiple orgasms for the first time!

Advising women to purchase cock rings for themselves may seem strange. But, did you know that you can upgrade old sex toys with a cock ring? That’s right. Instead of buying new sex toys, simply adding a vibrating cock ring to a dildo can create a plethora of brand new sensations without breaking the bank. The Bathmate Rhythm Rings have a range of different styles, textures and vibration patterns so you can switch things up whenever you feel like it! These rings are also powered by the Bathmate Bullet Vibe so you effectively get two sex toys for the price of one.

creating a spark in the bedroom this bonfire night

Pure Power

If pure power is your thing, the Doxy Wand Massager is one the strongest wand vibrators in the world and boasts 30% more power than the infamous Hitachi Wand. Based on a similar design but offering a powerful pattern of rumbling vibrations and speeds, this deep tissue massager goes to work on all your external hotspots to bring you to a sheet clutching climax. The Doxy is a great sex toy for those who struggle with low motility because it is easy to hold and the push button settings are simple to navigate. A cushioned head provides additional comfort whilst delivering maximum impact and orgasmic sensations. However, unlike the other pleasure products available at Bathmate Pleasure, the Doxy wand is mains powered and therefore cannot be used in the water. Instead, lather with extra lashings of water-based lubricant for super slippery sensations.

Training Academy

Anal training involves gently stretching the anus so that you can accommodate larger sex toys during sex, masturbation or as part of power play. Done correctly, this can be a lot of fun for the trainee. The Bathmate VIBE Training Plugs enable you to go about the serious business of training, with the toe curlingly tantalising pleasure of added vibration too. A tapered tip allows for easy insertion whilst a gentle bulb delivers a feeling of fullness, but with added pressure on the P Spot. For those who prefer buzz free anal stimulation, the removable bullet can be used to stimulate the other erogenous zones.

So, if Bonfire Night doesn’t get you in the mood for a little extra spark in the bedroom, take a look at the Bathmate Pleasure site and create a few fireworks of your own. After all, who doesn’t enjoy an evening that ends with a bang!

Trick or Treat: 11 Super Spooky Halloween Sex Toys

If October puts you in the mood for something a little different in the bedroom, it’s hardly surprising! The season of ghosts, ghouls and all things spooky brings opportunities to dress up in something naughty and thrill your lover by getting your Halloween freak on.

The build up to Halloween might also have you thinking about any horror themed sex toys and accessories you can use to match your macabre mood. To help you out a little, we put together some of our favourite horror themed sex toys. After all, Halloween only comes once a year, but at Bathmate our mission is to ensure that you ‘cum’ time and time again.

Glow in the Dark vibe rings

Bathmate’s very own glow in the dark vibrating cock rings offer you something a little extra in the bedroom – The novelty of a glow in the dark sex toy with proven results! These vibrating cock rings will hit the spot every time. With a design for every need, whether that be solo or couple play. The small yet powerful vibrating bullet will provide you with earth shattering orgasms!

Happy halloween

Fleshlight Freaks

The infamous Fleshlight Freaks range combines the three most popular textures; Vortex, Lotus and Stamina to stroke and suck the user to spine chilling climax. The Fleshlight Alien cock stroker is an out of this world blue Alien orifice for all those who prefer something a little out of this world. After use, like all Fleshlight products, the Alien can be stored discreetly out of sight and disguised as an ordinary household torch.

Bad Dragon Demogorgon

Enter the upside down with a creepy but erotic Demogorgon dildo from Bad Dragon. Few of us have seen Stranger Things than this visually appealing replica of a Demogorgan penis, but it certainly promises to make spines chill this Halloween. A combination of stimulating textures and gentle curves provide powerful G Spot massage whilst a textured base hit all the outer hotspots. What a spooktactular way to end a Netflix and Chill session this Autumn…

Grim Reaper Dildo

Knock ‘em dead this Halloween with the gruesome Grim Reaper dildo from Divine Interventions. Crafted from high quality silicone and over 7 inches in length and over an inch in diameter, this ghoulishly delightful dildo has strong ripples and raised detailing to ensure that it reaches all those inner hotspots.

Happy halloween

RIP Spanking Paddle

Twitchy palms at the ready this Halloween with the delightfully dastardly RIP spanking paddle from Geeky Sex Toys. Made from flexible silicone, this paddle delivers a hefty thwack with minimum effort and without damaging the paddle. Take this waterproof spanking paddle into the bath, shower or private pool and spank until you can’t take it any longer. The weighty but flexible design offers powerful intensity whilst a smooth side enables you to enjoy a light build up before delivering firm, powerful strokes with a thick, detailed side.

Skull Cock Ring

Benefit from a better boner this Halloween by adorning it with the Skull Cock Ring, also from Geeky Sex Toys. In addition to offering the same benefits as standard cock ring such as a longer lasting erection and multiple orgasms for men, this cock ring is crafted from silicone, so it is stretchy and very comfortable to wear. The raised textures don’t just look good, but they help to stimulate a female partner during sex too.

Pumpkin Butt Plug

Send chills up someone’s spine by adding a little Halloween mischief to booty play with the Pumpkin Butt Plug from Fairy Lust. With medium firmness and a plug diameter of 34mm, this is a great butt plug for beginners. A fun design and bright colours add a lively twist to this macabre game whilst extra pressure on the prostate opens the doors to explosive orgasms. Lightweight and flexible, this butt plug is ideal for more prolonged periods of play.


Experience realms of pleasure that go to infinity and beyond with Saucy from Outbound. This clitoral vibe boasts an unusual design and supernatural sensations. During use, Haptic response technology means that the harder you squeeze the vibrator, the most intense the vibration. In short, this little pocket rocket is simply out of this world…

Voodoo Eggs

Tone and tighten this Halloween for more intense and enjoyable orgasms. The Voodoo Eggs from Fantasticocks are strictly for vaginal use only and handcrafted for that personal touch. As the eggs jiggle intimately as you walk, the added pressure on the G Spot will drive you crazy with anticipation. For best results, finish your workout with a little external stimulation from your Bathmate Pleasure Vibe and experience a much-coveted dual orgasm. Finally, a workout that we can all get on board with!

Happy halloween

Black Widow Harness

Supernatural strap on adventures have never been more surreal with the Tantus Black Widow Harness. Beautifully crafted, this ominous harness boasts sheer artistry in every single detail. Adjustable straps and soft fabric ensure that optimum comfort is achieved at all times, whilst a removable O ring enables the wearer to interchange dongs easily. Soft webbing and fine detailing complete this Halloween themed pegging harness.

Shots Gentle Ghost Cock Ring

There will certainly be some moaning and wailing afoot with this Halloween with the cute but creepy Shots Gentle Ghost Cock Ring. A firm silicone ring keeps the wind in your sails, whilst a single speed vibrator shivers against the clit during penetrative sex. The result? Sex that is so good that you won’t be able to stop screaming about it.

Buying Halloween Sex Toys

As with all novelty sex toys, updating your collection with something fun and lively is a great way to spice up your sex life. However, it is always very important that purchase sex toys from a trusted sex toy retailer to ensure that you are receiving the best quality product. Some novelty sex toys do not undergo the same rigorous checks that are applied to other products, so it is important that you spend some time researching the item that you are buying. Halloween condoms and novelty condoms are best avoided unless they come from a trusted retailer and have the British Standard Kitemark.

Pumping your way to a Spooktacular Halloween with Bathmate

As Halloween approaches, we remember that the celebration isn’t all about dressing up, having fun and eating your body weight in free sweets. In fact, the tradition of All Hallows Eve stems back to the ancient Celtic festival of Samhain where Halloween was a celebration of the end of summer and a preparation for the beginning of a cold dark winter. Because winter often resulted in death for many people, the Celts believed that during the night before the New Year, the boundaries between earth and the world of the living dead were blurred, thus resulting in the ghosts of the dead walking the earth yet again.

So, what has this got to do with penis pumps? I hear you ask.

adult Halloween games

Halloween traditionally marks an ending and highlights a focus on new beginnings. For those who are feeling nervous about using a penis pump or have felt confused by some of the myths that they have heard about penis pumping, this could be the perfect opportunity to take the plunge and try it for the first time.

Cock Pump Basics

Bathmate penis pumps are the world’s most popular range of penis pumps and boasts over 1 million satisfied customers. For those who haven’t used a hydro penis pump before, hydro pumps use water instead of air to create a powerful vacuum which draws blood into the penis, thus creating a stronger and longer lasting erection. Once the erection has passed, the penis returns to its normal size.

Men who struggle with weak erections or erectile dysfunction will find that using a penis pump can help them to achieve an erection and enjoy a healthy sex life without the use of pills or creams which often come with side effects. One common myth is that erection problems only affect men as they get older. However, studies have shown that up to 50% of men have had trouble obtaining or maintaining an erection in the past.

Regular pumping can also help to increase the size and girth of your penis permanently so if that isn’t a good reason to keep a dick pump close to hand, I don’t know what is!
Let’s talk about dick pumping techniques

adult Halloween games

Hydro pumps are notoriously easy to use, but you may want to do a little prep first. At Bathmate, we recommend:

• Keep pubic hair neatly trimmed to avoid discomfort
• Use a small amount of lubricant to help create an airtight seal.
• Fill the pump with water to begin
• Place penis inside the pump to and create a tight seal
• Pump up and down to create a powerful vacuum
• Once the bellows remain compressed, optimal vacuum has been achieved
• Use for 2/3 minutes before taking a break to massage your penis for around 2 mins
• Repeat the process twice more (maximum of 15 minutes)
• *please note that techniques may vary slightly between models*

The use of a cock ring such as the Bathmate Power Ring can help your erection to remain thicker, stronger and longer lasting.

Size matters

Ever heard the saying, size matters?

When choosing a penis pump, sizing is extremely important. If you choose a penis pump that is too big for your penis, this may not create the sufficient levels of vacuum that you need to create an erection. Even worse, a chamber that is too big can suck the testicles into the pump and lead to a nasty injury. Those using a penis pump that is too small also risk pain, injury and peeling of the skin. At Bathmate, we offer a range of different sizes to ensure that all our customers enjoy safe, effective and enjoyable pumping. For best results, measure your penis when erect and regularly check your gains using the measuring gauge located on the outside of the penis pump. Those who find that the size of their penis is increasing may need to upgrade to a larger model.

adult Halloween games

Choosing the perfect penis pump

Those new to pumping may want to look at a the Bathmate Hydro Series. This pump is easy to navigate and uses a moderate level of vacuum to safely create an erection and enable you to work on more permanent results. Hydro7 is a standard size model and is better suited for those who measure between 5 and 7 inches when erect.

Those who require a product that is both powerful and better suited to their individual size needs may want to look at the Bathmate Hydromax range of penis pumps. This range is the best selling range of penis pumps in the world and deliver over 35% more power than the Bathmate Hydro, so it’s ideal for the more experienced pumper. This range also boasts a greater number of designs so that there is plenty of choice for those who require a size that falls outside of the ‘standard’ bracket. More recently, Bathmate introduced the Hydromax3 which is the world’s first ever micro penis pump. This pump is suitable for those who measure up to 3 inches when erect. The Hydromax Wide Boy also offers a wider chamber for those focusing on increasing the girth of their penis.

Experienced pumpers who prefer to take charge of their gains will find everything they need in the Bathmate HydroXtreme range of pumps. These pumps are the most powerful penis pumps on the market today and contain all the great features of the Hydromax, but with better control mechanisms, so you can tailor the experience to suit your individual needs. For the well-endowed, the HydroXtreme 11 has been created for those with an erect penis of over 9 inches in length, whilst the use of the unique hand ball feature enables you to enjoy full control by hand pumping until you get the perfect level of pressure.

As with all Bathmate products, all Hydro Pumps come with a 2 year manufacturers warranty.

Sexy Halloween games you Should Play with your Partner

Halloween always brings out two types of people, those ‘big kids’ who love everything spooky and love to dress up, or the party avoiders who hate the over-Americanised hype which has encompassed All Hallows Eve over the years. If Halloween isn’t your thing, it doesn’t mean that you should miss out on all the fun.

After all, you can always avoid the Trick or Treaters by locking the front door and enjoying a private Halloween party with someone spookily special. Once alone, add a little sex-factor to your private party by playing some super sexy Halloween foreplay games together.

Need a little inspiration? Allow us to assist.

Adult Halloween games

Morticia /Gomez Says…

Nobody speaks the language of love quite like Morticia and Gomez Addams. Their wanton lust and complete disregard for whomever is made to feel uncomfortable is well documented in the Addams Family TV Show and movies. For fans, create your own sexy spooky foreplay game in the style of ‘Simon Says’ but with just the two of you playing. Taking it in turns, female partners will say ‘Morticia says… take of your shirt (or whatever you want to say), and male players will use ‘Gomez’. If one of the players plays without the beginning of the phrase being use (same as Simon says), they lose their turn and the other player plays twice. This game is great for starting off slowly and getting you into the mood. This game is also helps your partner to gain a better insight into the things that turn you on because you’re are the person giving the instructions.

*Please remember to respect the consent and boundaries of your partner whilst playing*

The Spine Tingler

Nothing sends chills up and down the spine quite like being tied down and blindfolded. This game requires trust, props, a great imagination and a waterproof bedsheet because it can get very messy. But, if sensory play is something that you enjoy, this is the perfect game for you. Before the game begins, write a short story depicting a situation in which a person is kidnapped and held captive by evil spirits. However, all is not lost! As the evil spirits leave the house to seek out more unfortunate victims, friendly ghosts quickly intervene to undertake a rescue mission. However, the only way to free the victim from their constraints is through the power of pleasure!

With each different ghost you can have a different technique or prop in which the spirit seeks to ‘free’ your partner. For example, using ice cubes can illustrate a technique used by one spirit. As you run it over your partners body, warm wax can also be dripped and massaged into the skin to provide a contrast of sensations. Depending on how messy you’d like to go, you can use different foods to tease and lick your partner, spanking paddles, ticklers, your fingers, tongue…. Anything really! As you also set the rules, it can be one, two, three or more orgasms which mean that your partner goes free.

After that, its your turn!

Adult Halloween games

Costumes On!

Everyone knows the importance of foreplay. But still, most of us will admit that it is something that we still don’t do enough of. Costumes On! is a foreplay game which encourages longer lasting foreplay and combines it with some healthy competition. Starting with just your underwear, take it in turns to pleasure your partner for one minute. After a minute has passed, they must put an item of clothing (or their Halloween costume on) so it is like a reverse strip tease. As your partner adds more clothing, you will need to think of more inventive ways to get to those all-important erogenous zones.

The first person to beg for sex, is the loser!

The only rule in this game, is no oral sex! Instead, find other ways to make your partner literally beg for sex. The longer the game lasts, the harder and more fun it becomes.

Sexy Truth or Dare

This game requires a little preparation beforehand. Write out a selection of truths and dares and place them in hollowed out pumpkin. Have a selection of props available such as sex toys, massage oils and a blindfold and incorporate them into your dares too. Take turns to take a piece of paper out of the pumpkin to reveal your hidden desires, darkest fantasies, sexiest stories or take part in a spine tinglingly pleasurable dare.

Adult Halloween games

Blind Man’s Buff

Another old classic, but perfect for Halloween because it can be played in the dark. Strip completely naked, remove any obstacles and turn out the light. Seek out your partner in the dark and use your hands to guide your way around your partners body, aiming to pleasure them using just your hands and lips. Because you aren’t confined to the bed, this game is great for exploring different angles whilst darkness heightens your other senses. Once you find yourself coming close to orgasm, slip away from your partner and encourage them to find you again. This technique is called ‘edging’ and helps to prolong and intensify orgasm.

Cast the Die

For this game you’ll need dice and a piece of paper. For each number between 1 and 12 you need to write down a sexual act. It could be that one partner performs oral sex on another, or that your kiss your partners neck for a given length of time. To make things a little more exciting, one of you is evens and the other one is odds.

The game isn’t over until you have done all 12 acts.

Mirror, Mirror on the wall…

This sexy Halloween game is extremely simple but effective. Take off your clothes and face each other. One of you takes the lead whilst the other must mirror their actions. For example, if you decide to masturbate, your partner must also touch themselves whilst never taking their eyes away from you. If you kiss your partners neck, they must kiss your neck. This game is perfect for dropping subtle hints about the things that you’d like them to do to you in the bedroom.

Want to Lose Weight fast? Try these Simple Tricks Now

Do you want to lose weight? Then this is probably the article for you. There are lots of pre-conceived ideas and misconceptions surrounding diets and weight loss, most people believe they need to starve themselves in order to lose weight- in fact, it is this notion that puts people of dieting all together.

Whilst you will need to address your diet as a whole, its not about starving yourself. Actually, finding a balance and a diet that works for you will actually be much better in the long run. You need to consider the fundamentals and why you are dieting in the first place. For instance, you want to lose weight so you change your diet drastically and eat very little. This will actually have an negative affect. Your body will go into shock and store fat reserves instead of burning them.

How to lose weight fast

Counting calories and looking at the nutritional value of your food is probably the best place to start, if you are exersising alongside a diet your body will still need fuel. This is key to being successful in your efforts. By eating the right types of food you will reduce cravings, feel less hungry and reduce the risk of eating something you know you shouldn’t be eating!

In theory, you do need to eat less – or at least less of certain food types. But this is not enough by itself to lose weight. Ultimately, you will need to exercise, move more.

So what are the best exercises for a beginner wanting to lose weight?

Go for a walk

Just about anybody (of any fitness level) can go for a walk – if you are lucky enough to live near the countryside why not take in some of the amazing scenery this country has to offer. Live in a built up area or a large city? why not walk in to town instead of travelling by car or public transport? Need something from the local shop? – walk! by making these small and subtle changes to your lifestyle you will improve your overall health, lose weight and help save the environment!

Body weight exercises

Undertaking body weight exercises are great fro everybody as they don’t involve any special knowledge or expensive equipment! you can even do them in the comfort of your own home! Having covered body weight exercises in the past here are a few of our favourites and what they entail.

The best separated exercises are: burpees, mountain climbers and squat jumps. You haven’t heard of them before? No problem. So the first one were going to look at is called burpees or a burpee. Here is how to complete your first burpee – Squatting to the floor, then jumping to your feet to a plank position, jumping back in, and standing up. Why should you do them? This is called a “killer exercise” for a reason and it can burn 100 kcal in 10 minutes! Plus you do not need any equipment or experience to begin with.

How to lose weight fast

The Second exercise is called the mountain climber. Sound scary! How do you perform a mountain climber? From a push up position you run the knees in and out (as if jogging on the spot but from a crouch) as fast as you possibly can. Mountain climbers make your heart rate super-fast while building strength and endurance from the core outwards.

The third of these exercises are squat jumps. What does it look like? First of all, squat as low as you then jump as high as possible before landing. From a squat position, jump as high as you can then finish by returning to a squat position. Here, we have a variation. Prisoner squat jumps. This variation needs your hands to be put behind your head. Remember my friend, the more you sweat, the better the results will be.


Like walking, Jogging requires no prior experience and can be done at any fitness level. Not only will you lose weight but you will release feel good chemicals into your system which will help improve your mental health. You can jog anywhere, on the spot, the gym or your local park. With the nights drawing in it may be sensible to get a light or a high-vis pair of clothes to ensure you are safe whilst out and about. Jogging is a great way to become active because you can do it at your own pace, feel tired? slow down or walk – feel like you can push on? accelerate or try and beat last weeks record! There are lots of local running clubs you can join should you prefer a more sociable jog, and most will accept any skill and fitness level.

How to lose weight fast

So as you can see, if you want to lose weight you will need to look at a few areas, not just cutting down on food. Before making any huge lifestyle changes it is always best to consult a health professional first as your health is everything – even those of us with the right intentions can sometimes get it wrong – make sure you stay safe and don’t cause yourself any unwanted injuries.

4 Ways to Ensure your Work-Out is Stress Free!

Training can be the key to a healthy, balanced lifestyle. Working out releases feel good chemicals, balances our mental health and keeps us in shape. Whether you work out at home, outside or in a gym most of us just want to crack on and get the job done, especially if working out isn’t really your thing!

To reap the rewards from a good work out session you’ll want to plan ahead. You may even have a routine that you stick to but most people wont consider one thing stress! If like others, your work out is designed to help you de-stress from a busy day at work you may not actually notice that external influences may be adding to this stress you were supposed to be leaving behind! So what can be done to avoid any unnecessary stresses when training?

how to keep your work out stress free

Avoid peak times

Yes, you’ve got it! One of the biggest thing’s that contributes to rising stress levels in the gym is not being able to use the equipment you need to complete your routine, or people just getting in the way in general. By avoiding 2 peak times you can limit this hindrance. We actually he 2 things to consider, the time of day during the week and the month of the year, you ar probably well aware of the new year, new me gang that come out of the wood work every January and pack the gym out for 2 weeks before realising its not for them and never coming back! Then we have the more frequent occurrence of on peak and off peak times. For regular gym goers you will notice a trend, some people are only available to train at peak times during the day so if you are a little more flexible when it comes to your schedule try and do your training session during off peak hours (you may even get a discount) this means you can turn up and train totally stress free!


Have a think about what machines you want to use, which equipment you’ll need and plan ahead. This way you can focus on reps and form, remember to include your warm up, stretches and warm down. Once you have figured out which equipment you will need to use you can start to visualise in your head the nest order to do your work out in. This will benefit because it will save time, avoid distractions and mean you can get on with the task at hand. It may seem counter intuitive to do all this work before you’ve even got to the gym but believe us, it will mean your training session passes by glitch free and stress free.

how to keep your work out stress free


There is another type of stress, this is the pressure you are putting your body under. To make sure you are getting the most out of your work out you will need to fuel your body accordingly. Diet plays a huge role in you meeting your fitness targets, now this can mean anything from looking at the amount of calories you eat a day to taking a pre work out mix or a protein shake to help you recover after training. This can ensure your workout is pain free and you are not putting your body under any additional stress.

Safety first

Stay safe. Make sure you have full inductions on all the machinery you plan to use and only ever use the machines as directed. Give yourself time off to recover in between sets and training sessions and never train on an injury. You can end up doing more bad than good and setting your progress back months. Always ask a member of staff if you are unsure there will tend to be a personal trainer and trained member on staff on hand at all times, you aren’t putting them out so don’t worry or feel embarrassed, its their job to ensure you can train safely and stress free!

how to keep your work out stress free

Sugar Rush: 3 Reasons To Cut down on Sugar Now

When it comes to meeting and surpassing your health and fitness goals the number enemy to your successes is probably sugar. Sugar causes a multitude of health issues.

It is thought that having the wrong type of sugar in your diet increases the risk of diabetes, obesity and heart disease greatly. We aren’t saying it isn’t ok to indulge your sweet tooth every once in a while, just try not to let it become a regular occurrence. You need to try to avoid foods that quickly affect your blood pressure, this is the most dangerous to your health.

The risks of sugar

Atkins recently wrote a list of 10 reasons why sugar is bad, now were not suggesting you should panic but this is pretty serious!

1. Sugar causes glucose levels to spike and plummet.
2. Sugar increases the risk of obesity, diabetes, and heart disease.
3. Your immune function can be affected by sugar.
4. A high-sugar diet can lead to chromium deficiency.
5. Sugar accelerates aging.
6. Sugar causes tooth decay.
7. Sugar can cause gum disease, which can lead to heart disease.
8. Sugar affects cognition in children.
9. Sugar increases stress.
10. Sugar takes the place of important nutrients.

What are the types of sugar?

There are four main types of sugar. Glucose is the sugar in blood and dextrose is the name given to glucose that can be produced from corn. Fructose is the main sugar in fruit. Sucrose is what is known as granulated, or table sugar and HFCS is derived from corn starch.

The risks of sugar

So what can we do to cut down and what are the benefits?

Just add water

Cut out fizzy drinks and pop from your diet. You’d be surprised at the huge amount of sugar in one small can of coke. When you cut out fizzy drinks and replace them with something like lemon water your skin will clear, mood will lift and you will lose weight. This simple and effective lifestyle change also boosts your sexual performance, not only will you look and feel great but you will be able to perform in the bedroom like you have never been able to perform.

Fill the void

You will experience cravings, if you manage them effectively and actively seek to give your body what it needs, not what you think it requires – you will be on the road to success – by finding what works for you as an individual you will see how easy it is to replace toxins in your diet.

Cheat days

This will always come down to personal opinion – some of us believe we should treat ourselves occasionally – some of us find that giving in to temptation, however temporary is the slippery slope to total downfall. If you decide to give yourself the occasional cheat day you can treat yourself without feeling too guilty – there are protein bars, shakes, even yogurts that won’t ruin your gains – in fact some will even add to them!

Cutting down on sugar can mean the difference between success and failure when it comes to your fitness and lifestyle goals – with the correct knowledge and foresight you can achieve anything, remove temptation, count calories and try to take a more considerate approach to your nutritional needs. You will ultimately benefit in the long run from making small changes in the here and now.

The risks of sugar

Does sugar affect my mental health?

For those of you who are struggling with mental health issues, there is a link between your physical and mental health you may not be totally aware of. When you improve your overall physical health by making changes to your diet such as cutting down, or cutting out sugar all together you will see an improve in your mood. This will give you confidence that spills over into your work, and social life. When we feel better about ourselves we can truly live our best life – Just remember to consult a health professional before undertaking any drastic lifestyle changes.

Too Much of a Good Thing: Are you Addicted to Masturbating?

What is masturbation?

Conventionally, masturbation is described as the stimulation of your genitals for arousal or sexual pleasure. Anyone can masturbate regardless of age, gender or relationship status, just as long as they are experiencing sexual urges. Those in relationships may also enjoy masturbation too, it’s a perfectly natural way to explore your sexuality and learn about your body.

Addiction to masturbation explained

Masturbation is fun and healthy. However, like everything, moderation is key. Masturbating too often or excessively to the point that it is causing problems in day to day life may be a sign of masturbation addiction or compulsive masturbation as it is sometimes known. Other signs of masturbation addiction include:

are you addicted to masturbation?

Low productivity

Calling in sick at work or being unable to complete tasks because you spend so much time masturbating can be a sign that you are struggling with an addiction to masturbation.

Risky masturbation

If you find yourself engaging in risky masturbation such as masturbating in public because you cannot fight the urge to masturbate, this could be a sign of masturbation addiction.

Masturbating when you don’t feel sexual

If you’re masturbating when you don’t feel sexual or not enjoying it may also be an indicator of an addiction to masturbation.

Feeling guilty after masturbation

Some people experience shame after masturbation because they are led to believe that it is wrong. However, if you’re experiencing low moods and strong guilt afterwards, this can lead to long term negativity about sex and masturbation in general. Masturbation is a pleasurable experience and should be considered as such.

are you addicted to masturbation?

Using masturbation as a coping mechanism

Regularly turning to masturbation as a way of managing low moods or as a distraction from stressful situations may be a worrying sign that things aren’t quite right. That’s not to say that masturbation isn’t a great way to relieve tension! However, regularly ignoring your feelings and distracting yourself with masturbation could indicate an addition.

Over reliance on pornography

Masturbation addiction and an over reliance on pornography usually go hand in hand. However, if you find that you are unable to become aroused without watching pornography before masturbation, or even before sex, this could be a sign of an addiction.

A lack of sex with your partner because of excessive masturbation

If your urges to masturbate are causing problems in your relationship, or you are masturbating so much that you are no longer interested in a sexual relationship with your partner, it is likely that you may have an issue that you need to seek help for.

Staying in to masturbate instead of going to work or out with friends

Isolating yourself because you feel ashamed or avoiding family and friends because you want to stay in and masturbate is also a huge red flag. May people isolate themselves to hide an addiction and this simply adds to the feeling that you are struggling alone.

Being unable to stop masturbating, even if you want to If you want to stop masturbating so frequently but you can’t, this indicates an addiction to masturbation. Quite often, the problem isn’t how much you masturbate because this is different for everyone. But the issue is when you make the decision to stop but you are unable to, especially if masturbation is causing problems.

are you addicted to masturbation?

Becoming addicted to masturbation

There are two key substances that play a part in masturbation addiction. The first is dopamine which plays a part in the ‘reward transmission’ of arousal. When you begin to masturbate, the pleasurable feelings that you experience are caused by the transmission of dopamine. When the pleasure peaks and you climax, endorphins are released which make you feel happy, relaxed and sleepy. When people become reliant on masturbation as a coping mechanism, this opens the door for masturbation addiction.

Some of the effects of masturbation addiction include:

• Low productivity due to excessive masturbation or watching too much pornography
• Unrealistic sexual expectations, this can be due to watching porn
• Struggling to become aroused without certain triggers such as watching pornography
• Sore or chafed genitals
• Low self esteem
• Isolating yourself from friends and family
• Losing friends due to changing plans at last minute and telling lies to stay home and masturbate.

Who suffers from addiction to masturbation?

Anyone can suffer from an addiction to masturbation, whether male or female. However, according to a study conducted by the University of Indiana more men masturbate than women, but that doesn’t mean that they are addicts. Some masturbation is perfectly normal. Studies have shown that more men have admitted to a masturbation addiction than women, but perhaps it is simply
something that women prefer not to speak about.

Techniques to curb an addiction to masturbation

Admitting that you have an addiction to masturbation is the first step to getting your life back on track. However, like any addiction there will be several challenges that you will need to overcome.

Here are a few techniques to help you on your journey:

Avoid high risk situations

Recognising triggers and removing your access to them may help you to curb the urge to masturbate. Of course, you won’t be able to avoid them forever, but as long as you are aware of your triggers you won’t be caught off guard.

Learn new ways to relax

Masturbation to relieve tension is a way of escaping, rewarding ourselves and relaxing. However, without using masturbation to do this, you will need to seek out new techniques to prevent yourself from relapsing back into an addiction to masturbation. This could be taking up a new hobby, going for a walk or even reading a book.

Work on your coping skills

When you feel stressed out and tense, you tend to reach for something that is familiar and comforting, such as masturbation. Cognitive behavioural therapy is a great way to relearn new coping mechanisms reduce negative thinking so that you cope with tricky situations differently.

Be honest with yourself

You don’t have to tell everyone about your addiction, its personal. But you do need to be honest with yourself. There is a saying, ‘Nothing changes if nothing changes’ which means that you have to make some changes to see the results that you want. If you relapse, be honest with the people who are supporting you and use it as a learning tool to help you recover. If you lie to others and lie to yourself, you are not making the changes that you need for success.

Be persistent but patient

Recovery from any addiction takes a lot of time and patience, don’t be too hard on yourself. Set yourself realistic goals and stick to them. Find other ways to reward yourself and use every day as a learning tool. You will find some days easier than others, but don’t be too hard on yourself if you find it difficult sometimes.

Where to get help if you’re a masturbation addict

Seek help from your GP or a trained counsellor. They will help you to work on some techniques such as distraction and refer you to a specialist service that may be able to help. If you have access to the internet, websites such as No Fap have some great resources for dealing with a masturbation and porn addiction.


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